Personalizing the Green River

Dan and Lisa -- my dear friends and ex-Earthworks coworkers -- introduced us to western rivers with a 6 day, 40+ mile wilderness float on the Green River in Utah, just above where it enters Canyonlands National Park (Ruby Ranch to Mineral Bottom, for those who know about these things).

Before this trip, the Green River has been almost mythical to me: John Wesley Powell; the epitome of beyond the 100th meridian; a wilderness remnant, soldiering on into the 21st century.

I have since learned that pissing in a river for a week* demythologizes it.  We are now intimates -- me, my river trip companions, the Green River, and the tens of millions of Los Angelenos, Las Vegans, Phoenix-ites and everyone else who will soon be drinking (and my have already drunk!) my urine.

I compose myself after taking care of business.
Photo thoughtfully provided by Dan Randolph

Urine aside, I can't recommend a float on the Green River highly enough.  Jawdropping scenery + blessed solitude = enforced serenity.  And that's the serenity I need; it's not coming to me spontaneously.

Hope to post more on the River float, meeting Mike and Max Eisenfeld, and more pics, later.

*Dan Randolph, river man, informs me (and the BLM corroborates) that one must urinate directly into the Green and NOT into the beaches or other areas near the river.  He tells me that there isn't enough water in the land to decompose urine solids (urea?) -- and so if we were to pee on the land (and others did the same) we would cause it to stink (and presumably burn it, the same way overfertilizing does).

The Cumberlander rejects the tyranny of chronology

Writing from Chez Sampat-Hensler in Albany, CA.  Tomorrow we pick up the other half of the Septoff-Keech Kollective at the Oakland International Airport.  "Eager" would not be the wrong word to describe us.

As you may have noticed, we have been away from the internet.  "Away" physically and mentally.

Now we are back and probably will be for some time.  

But I'm not going to try to cover this trip day by day ("Day X: blah blah blah).  Too much like work.

Day 6: Travel day -- Hays, KS to Alamosa, CO

Not much to report.

Decided in advance to hotel it so we could watch Game 7 of the Heat-Celtics series.  Boo Heat!

There is a decided odor to our vehicle at this point.  I suspect forgotten food squirreled away by the back seat resident.

Driving across western Kansas/eastern Colorado is an experience in flatness.  Saw some antelope in Colorado.

Day 5: the Arch, REI & Kansas hotels

Woke up at Edmund Babler Memorial State Park outside St. Louis, went to sleep in Hays, Kansas Sleep Inn  (541 miles).

A full day: tourism, consumerism, drivingism?, and a brief encounter with the sordid side of life.

Tourism: the Arch
Returned to the Arch for the first time in 20 years.  Last time here, went up with Cheryl (pre-Sabo!)  and Keil and Serena (I think).

It looks as impressive as it did 20 years ago.  What I didn't recall was that the closer you get, the more impressive it looks.

The Park Service has entered into a partnership with a private vendor to run the system (tram to the top, riverboat cruises, etc).  They call the partnership the "Core" of Discovery.  Which they probably mean to be clever -- but every time I read it I think: you spelled it wrong, idiots.

Mitch was impressed,  but not as engaged as I might have hoped.  Not interested in any of the history.  I think the highlight was the tram ride to the top.

Consumerism: REI

Mitch still needed some gear for the river trip, so we stopped by REI.  In addition to raincoat, sunglasses and fleece, we got a hammock ratchet.  

A hammock ratchet is just a dead simple way to attach the hammock the tree -- which feels like cheating, until I stop and think about (a) how inept I am with knots and (b) how much time it takes me to sling a hammock with just rope and knots.  Know your limits, I say.

Drivingism: St. Louis to Hays, KS

We used priceline to buy  room in Salina, KS -- which was a perfect length drive.  But it didn't work out -- and the town was full-up for some festival, so we pushed on to the next sizable town.

Sordid: our initial hotel

The directions to our priceline hotel steered us into sketchier and sketchier parts of Salina, KS.  When we finally arrived, at 10:30-11, it was a place that looked like it rented rooms by the hour.  Beater cars in the 3/4th empty parking lot (when the rest of the hotels in town were jammed with festival goers), guy in a sweat stained wife beater just hanging out on the 2nd floor balcony eyeballing us as we registered.

I would have risked it anyway.  But then we went into the room.  

The sheets had not been changed in who-knows-how-long.  We could tell this because: (a) they were stained with who-knows-what, (b) there were hairs all over the place and (c) there appeared to be roach droppings on the pillows and toilet.

Word to the wise: if you threaten a hotel manager with negative reviews (and pictures) on yelp and travel advisor, they will sometimes (after initial refusal) refund your money even though they are not obliged to by your priceline contract.

And that's how we wound up at the Sleep Inn in Hays, about 100 miles further down the road.

Day 4: Six Flags

Woke up at Edmund Babler Memorial state park.

Eggs and good bacon for breakfast: mmmm.

Went for a brief run in what is a CCC park.  Wonder how the locals feel about their park, the federal govt that built it, and taxation to maintain it.  Incidentally, the MO state park online presence is excellent in function and design.

Six Flags

Six Flags St Louis was fun.  We discovered that Mitch loves the whirly-toss-your-cookies rides, while I prefer the roller coasters.  Mitch was REALLY jazzed for his first grown-up roller coaster, until he actually went on one.  It was a bit more intense than he was expecting.  Fun though.

His highlight, apart from supreme whirly-toss-your-cookies ride (the Excalibur -- imagine a 150 foot tower that spins you upside down) was the Tidal Wave.  Both the riding part and the getting splashed part.

Riding:

Splashing:

We also discovered that Six Flags' strategy to leave bankruptcy behind is to try and trap as much consumer surplus as humanly possible: they are SHAMELESS about upselling pretty much everything.  Getting off rides forces you through gift shops.  You're asked to upgrade your ticket about every other moment.  You pay to get in the park, and then you pay more to ride premium rides.  This on top of a $50/head entrance fee.  In sum: fun was had, don't recommend it.

There is a water park attached to Six Flags, and we would have used it -- but they don't tell you that, unlike the rest of the park which closes at 10, the waterpark closes at 6.  Very very disappointed Mitchell.

Consolation prize for Mitch: movie night in the tent.

I suddenly become a geek in overlarge shades

Hey, sorry, Dad took a picture of me in my new sunglasses and raincoat. Look. So I nearly get overheated and when we finally roll into our new hotel I'm literally cross-eyed with tiredness. no big deal, right? O.K. O.K. maybe it's a big deal, but on the upside I'm not dead.

Day 3: the Magic House and Babler Memorial State Park

Started our day at a hotel we snagged off priceline.com.

This was not the original plan.  The original plan was to come into Edmund Babler memorial state park and camp.  But we came into town really late, and the campground was not encouraging about our chances of finding a spot without a reservation.   Getting hotels rather than campsites turns out to be a developing trend.

The Magic House
The good thing about the hotel: it was 10 minutes from our first main attraction in St. Louis: The Magic House.

The Magic House (photos) is essentially a very well done kids science museum: van de graaff (sp?) generator, climbing towers, optical illusions, etc.

In retrospect, I find it hard to put my finger on exactly what distinguishes it from what I think of as the cookie cutter kid's science museums -- the one in Boston and the one in Baltimore are basically the same museum.  But Magic House was superior.

Perhaps it was just the thought/flow.  The museum itself is kind of a maze in a good way -- everything flows into everything else in multiple ways.  It's kind of like a casino -- you lose yourself in it.  It's unlike a casino in that (a) we didn't mind, and (b) great things were usually just around the corner.

The highlight: a "crime solvers" exhibit.  Basically they had the kids walk through 20 or so tasks to solve a crime -- it included decrypting various secret codes, pattern matching, magnifying glasses, secret doors, hidden passages, climbing through ceilings, microscopes (fingerprinting, fiber matching), and computers.  In all, much brain engaging and exercising in pursuit of a clear goal.  Really cool.  SPOILER:, the air conditioning repairman did it.

Edmund Babler Memorial State Park
We stayed 2 nights here.  A nice place.  The nearest state park with camping to St. Louis.  Located in Wildwood -- which is apparently (judging by shopping and vehicles) is a really money part of the metro area.

Notable events at the park:
We make foil dinners and 'smores.  Mitch claims that they are the best foil dinners ever -- even better than mom's.  Upon learning of this, mom demands a foil dinner roast-off with a 3-judge panel.

Most aggressive raccoons I have ever personally encountered.  They brought to mind the chipmunks on Angel's Landing in Zion National Park.  They tried to get into our car while we were not 20 feet away and looking at them.  Kinda freaked Mitch out.  Really annoying b/c you couldn't leave the car open at all, or leave the picnic table alone for a second.

Side-benefit of having electric in the campsite for infernal sleeping/breathing device: movie night is always an option.

Day 6: Realizations

A note from the Hays, Kansas Sleep Inn.

ONE:

Blogging properly -- either as a chronicle of events or as a chronicle of ideas -- is harder work than I thought.  To do it right, it probably needs to be done regularly and with thought.

Given this epiphany, I may rename this sucker to "An Improper Blog"

TWO:

Cooking in camp with one adult is much harder than I expected.

THREE:

My back is now more of a limiting factor in determining the limits of nonstop driving than my son.  My back also limits the camping I can do.  At least the uncareful kind.

FOUR:

My son doesn't realize his limits/needs (e.g. bathroom, food, sleep) until after he has (nearly) exceeded them (that just made my lovely wife think "aaaaaaaaaah!" and "I knew it!" in quick succession).  Fortunately, he's resilient.

FIVE:

It is very very easy for a certain kind of person (e.g. me) to fill up pages with negative observations.  This does not accurately reflect reality, though.  So I will try to emphasize the positive in recounting days three through five.  But that will mean editing my first impulses, which I'm not sure i want to do.  Hm.

Day 2 - In which our trip almost ends prematurely

Woke up at Elkhorn campground in Frankfort, KY.  For an RV private campground, a nice spot.  In the bend of Elkhorn creek -- our campsite was right near the creek.  Mitch took his trip photographer responsibilities very seriously.

Leaving the campground was our first time packing up camp -- I think we're organized now in the car... for camping.

We unexpectedly wound up at a hotel at the end of Day 2 -- we are NOT organized for hotel camping.  Getting at clothes, toiletries, etc requires getting behind the tent/campkit/etc.

Tourista activities on day 2:

Buffalo Trace Distillery (thanks for the tip Jen Krill): bourbon cream liqueur -- mmmm.  Interesting factoid: different floors in the aging warehouse produce different flavor bourbons.  I knew different aging regions (as with scotch) produce different tasting whiskey -- but not different floors.  Apparently temperature variations play a big role.

Alas, the more I drink bourbon, the more I realize I'm a scotch whiskey man.

After the Distillery, we had lunch at Jim's Seafood.  Jim's is notable only for the fact that it is DIRECTLY on the Kentucky River overlooking a dam.  I will link to photos once they're uploaded.

Louisville Slugger Factory: an unplanned sidetrip that happened b/c of one of those little tourist flyers that campgrounds post.  Louisville is bigger than I expected -- with a pretty significant sidewalk culture (at least on Main).

The I think I might have enjoyed the factory more than Mitch.  Got to see actual bats made -- the factory and the museum are all of a whole.  The difference between a major league bat and other bats are two:  quality of wood (grain) and the template used for lathing.  For major league bats, the lathe is computer driven and is precise to the 1000th of an inch.  For other bats, there's 23 or 24 physical metal templates that the lathe follows.

Unexpected tribulations:

Making the side trip to Louisville Slugger would have put us into our intended campsite after dark and without electric.  Mitch made a fervent request to have certain boy wizard movies available for viewing, which required electric -- as did blog posting -- as did NBA playoff viewing.

All this is a longwinded way of saying that we wound up at a hotel (note: priceline.com works) where our trip almost came to an end just as it started.  Mitch came out of the shower, slipped and hurt his wrist ( the same one he broke earlier this year).  It looked like we were headed to the emergency room the next morning, but after sleeping on it the pain is almost completely gone. We'll keep a close eye on it.

5/5/5
15/30/30

License plate collecting

Seen on our trip:

1. Maryland
2. Arkansas
3. Virginia
4. West Virginia S4UBHB
5. Ohio
6. Louisiana
7. Florida
8. South Dakota
9. Kentucky
10. North Carolina
11. Indiana
12. Illinois
13. Missouri
14. California
15. South Carolina
16. Tennessee
17. Kansas
18. Arizona
19. Nebraska
20. Minnesota

Day 1

day 1: Cumberland to Frankfort,KY overnight at elkhorncampground.com Mitch helps set up tent. tomorrow: bourbon tour and on to st. Louis

Mitch's first blog post

Hi, posting from a hotel in St. Louis, MO. Today as we were packing up camp, I saw some Canadian Geese up close. I also saw the St. Louis Arch for the first time. It is huge. I mean huge. Look at the size of that thing. Anyway it was awesome day overall. Mitchell Septoff from some hotel in St. Louis, MO.

The beginning of a big adventure

Here starts the Sabbatical blog.

Day before we leave, I'm backing up the Doolimer music collection.  Rather than packing clothes or camping gear.

Our itinerary is a work in progress.  As it evolves, will hopefully be keeping this map up to date.

First stop will be Frankfort, KY and the Buffalo Trace bourbon distillery tour (thanks to Jen Krill recommend).

First campsite will be Elkhorn private campground.

Hoping that Mitch will occasionally join in the blog.